Three Untruths

Every so often a book catches fire in the world of higher education punditry. The Coddling of the American Mind by Greg Lukianoff and Jonathan Haidt is a recent example. I’ve read many articles referring to Coddling, some by people who have actually read the book, and I’ve seen references to it by many others who refer to these articles even if they haven’t read the book for themselves. By the time I put my name on the hold list at my local library, it was quite long. The book finally arrived and now I can say I’ve read it.

Many have commented that the book’s title is less than apt to its content. I agree, but it depends on how one defines the word ‘coddling’. (The authors define it as ‘overprotection’.) The book’s subtitle more aptly presents the problem: “How Good Intentions and Bad Ideas are Setting Up a Generation for Failure”. One point brought up in Coddling is ‘concept creep’ – the usage of words such as ‘trauma’ and ‘aggression’ are specific examples the authors bring up. Thanks to all the punditry, this book is likely contributing to an expanded definition of the word ‘coddling’. Interestingly, the book’s title did not originate from the authors but from an editor, when the forerunner to the book was published with the same title in The Atlantic.

I’m glad Lukianoff and Haidt were able to expand their thoughts carefully and potentially constructively in the extended form of this book. Over the years I’ve found myself increasingly tempted to consume information through short articles, but that often papers over the nuance and complexity of the issues involved. I have to consciously make an effort to read longer, often denser, treatises to get a better handle on things. (After all, I study complex systems.) If we all took a little more time to read, listen and think, and curb the temptation to knee-jerk reactions of outrageous response, the world might be a better place.

The authors try to do this in their book by first presenting the Three Great Untruths that fuel the vicious cycle of outrage that have been highlighted by the mass media. What makes an insidious Untruth easy to propagate? Popular Lies, those that get repeated over and over again, have a grain of truth in them and they hit close to home. Distorted, yes, but when it resonates, it kinda, sorta feels like it might be true.

First up is the Untruth of Fragility. This perhaps is where Coddling gets its name. The catchphrase? “What doesn’t kill you makes you weaker.” Play to your strengths! Avoid challenges that might make you look weak! If you get a C in this class, your ambitious dreams are over. If you struggle, you lose pace, and you’re out of the running in the ratrace of life. There is a grain of truth. If the struggle is severe enough (and without recourse or help), it can make you weaker. But human beings time and again show that they are often more robust and come out of a struggle (with scars perhaps) but overall in better shape and able to withstand more challenges.

Next, there’s the Untruth of Emotional Reasoning: “Always trust your feelings”. Sometimes your gut instinct tells you the right thing to do. You shouldn’t just discount your feelings – they can be a useful source of information. But emotions don’t always lead you in the right direction, even though there’s something that feels ‘right’ about following your feelings – you’re being ‘true to yourself’. It requires struggle to do something contrary to one’s feelings as if you’re resisting your own ‘will’ so to speak. When someone hurts my feelings, it feels painful. My antagonist might be malicious, but it might also be an honestly unintentioned hurt.

This leads to the Untruth of Us versus Them: “Life is a battle between good people and evil people.” Arguments have been made that humans are, to some extent, evolutionarily wired towards tribalism. Community has many advantages including strength in numbers. Strengthening ties within that community, can often be enhanced by having a common obstacle or enemy to be overcome or withstood. If I’m on the side of Good, anyone who is not on my side is Evil!

The next six chapters discuss the sources of this shift towards these Untruths. The chapter I found most interesting was the analysis of growing anxiety and depression, particularly in iGen – kids born circa 1995 and thus entering college circa 2013. There are multiple possible reasons for this trend, and the authors try to address the available evidence. As you might have guessed, it’s complicated. There is no smoking gun explanation but there are interesting correlations that likely require further study. The graphs showing adolescent depression rates is, well, depressing. Apparently, it’s significantly worse for females compared to males. Cases of “nonfatal self-inflicted injuries” have increased noticeably since 2010, as iGen girls enter their high school years.

“Paranoid Parenting” and “The Decline of Play” are among the six. According to the authors, childhood has become test prep. Although the present book focuses on the U.S. and makes reference to English-speaking countries, it would be interesting to compare the data with East Asia – where test prep reigns supreme in many countries. In my regular job as a college professor, I don’t often interact directly with parents of my students except on graduation day. However, as a student-adviser I’ve noticed more issues related to mental health and intrusively concerned parenting. As an administrator, I’ve seen my share of more complicated cases. All I will say is that things can be quite challenging for today’s youth. I’m glad I grew up in a different milieu, when things seemed truly simpler and less stressful.

To balance the three Untruths, the authors close with a section titled “Wising Up”. There are a number of suggestions. I won’t go through them in detail, but here are three catchphrases mentioned that counter the three Untruths.

·      Prepare the child for the road, not the road for the child

·      Your worst enemy cannot harm you as much as your own thoughts, unguarded

·      The line dividing good and evil cuts through the heart of every human being

There are no simple solutions although the authors briefly discuss societal changes that could steer us away from the intensifying of Coddling. It will be difficult.